Confession: I Hide in the Bathroom

Many moons ago, when Sudoku was all rage, I remember coming across Sudoku toilet roll. I swear to you, I thought it was the most ridiculous thing ever. I totally judged anyone that might want to spend that much time on the bog.

Oh how the mighty fall.

Nowadays, the bathroom is my sanctuary, my retreat, my haven away from the big bad world!

Hiding in the bathroom funny meme

OK, I’ll stop with the exaggerations, but this next part is definitely true:

I spend a lot of extra time in the bathroom, just to get some me-time squeezed in. Some days, there is literally no other way to do so.

Now that my daughter is a toddler just shy of 18 months, let’s just say life is all systems go, go, go! I have been known on a number of occasions to “desperately” need to use the bathroom, shooting my husband my best “please-take-over” face, and promptly locking myself in before he has the chance to fully process what’s just happened.

best idea ever

What am I doing in there, you say? Here are a few examples:

  1. Nothing. I’m literally just sitting in silence.
  2. Catching up on 500 whatsapp msgs.
  3. Reading emails. Including all the ones I’d normally delete unopened.
  4. Checking Facebook.
  5. And Twitter.
  6. And Instagram.
  7. And most recently, Snapchat.
  8. Oh what the heck, let’s see what’s on Flipboard too.
  9. Some more silence.
  10. Imagining how I could give the bathroom a makeover…
  11. I tell myself I’m going to scrub the taps… one day.
  12. I wish I had that book that I started reading 6 months ago in there…
  13. Hold my breathe because I think my little one just yelled “mama!”
  14. False alarm. Silence again.
  15. Recheck Whatsapp.
  16. Look at everyone’s Whatsapp profile pictures.
  17. Google “recipes with chicken” or something equally vague that will have 1,000,000 results.
  18. Block out the sound of my husband asking our daughter “where’s mama?”
  19. Go back to Facebook.
  20. Take multiple screenshots of people my friends and I stalk (don’t pretend you don’t)
  21. Send said screenshots via Whatsapp.
  22. Back to doing nothing again.
  23. Listen to the sound of a tiny, inquisitive hand gently knocking on the door…
  24. Jump when it rapidly changes to mad banging!
  25. Wonder if she needs a nappy change.
  26. Remember that its almost dinner time and I haven’t made her anything!
  27. This time, muster up a reply when I hear “MAMAAAAAA!”
  28. Check my phone one last time before pressing the lock button.
  29. Open the door and…
  30. We’re back to all systems go!!!

Have you ever hidden in the bathroom from your life, and if not… where do you hide? (There has to be somewhere!)

Shared with:

Mr and Mrs T Plus Three
The Secret Diary of Agent Spitback
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21 thoughts on “Confession: I Hide in the Bathroom

  1. Shamiala Kausar says:

    Hahahaha so that’s where you reply to us from 😂😂😂

    As long as your checking the 500 plus whatsapps and reading them it’s all good!

    Also my youngest sister who has 3 kids under 5 can totally relate to you we also find her taking long bathroom breaks but she usually has her husband or at least one kid banging on the door to see why she’s taking so long….

  2. Theo says:

    That’s not fair I can’t hide there the kids follow me in there! My four year old is pulling the toilet paper and my little one is trying to pull me off the toilet!!

  3. reimerandruby says:

    So funny and yet so true! I can totally relate to all of these! Just the best time to check social media peacefully, isn’t it? Lovely post! #TheList

  4. Bear and Cardigan says:

    So true! I dont do whatsapp but the rest oh yes! Just for 5 minutes for me when I have Bear (15 month old grandson) who I love deeply but sometimes just need a bit of peace lol #abitofeverything

  5. The Anxious Dragon says:

    I recall those days, although it was before the interweb so I had magazines in the bathroom. If you have a tablet you could even blog on the loo!!!
    Thanks for linking up, Tracey xx #abitofeverything

  6. sarahjmir says:

    please. who doesn’t try and hide from their kids in the bathroom. it is sometimes the only sane thing to do.

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